The Welcoming Prayer

Last Sunday, the first Sunday in Lent, I mentioned that each week during Lent I want to recommend a discipline for members of our congregation to practice. This week I'd like to recommend the "welcoming prayer." The welcoming prayer is a very simple and potentially liberating way to bring our anxious thoughts, reactions and lingering sins to God so that God can transform them. Several people have written about the welcoming prayer; I learned it from Pastor Cynthia Bourgeault. In what follows, I am giving my own interpretation to this helpful concept.

Allow me to share a personal experience. This last week I met a person in a public setting who somehow triggered an old prejudice in me. There was something in this man's appearance that 'pushed a button' in me, and before I knew what had hit me I had already jumped to judgments about him. Because of the way he looked, I found myself wanting to distance from him. It was as though a little flag went off in my brain that said, "That's not my kind of person." Before I could think, I had drawn a circle and placed him on the outside.

I was immediately ashamed of my reaction. After all, I've come to believe that the way of Jesus is a way of hospitality. He welcomes the tax collector and the sinner. How can I, a Christian, react with immediate judgment based solely on the way a person looks? "What a childish attitude," I thought to myself. But still, there they were, two afflictive thoughts that arose in me like a tide: prejudice and judgmentalism.

Now, there are different ways I could respond. I could embrace this sudden uprising of prejudice and judgmentalism. I could choose not to care, make them part of my life, and find ways to justify them. This would probably have the effect of making them more entrenched in my character. Needless to say, I'm not a big fan of this approach.

A second option: I could fight these afflictive ideas (prejudice and judgmentalism) with all of my energies. I could exercise all of my best efforts to resist them. I would say, in effect, "I will not be judgmental, I will not be prejudiced." The problem here, of course, is that it usually doesn't work. When I bring up all of my energies to fight an afflictive idea or attitude, I usually simply empower it. Did you ever see (forgive me for this terrible example) the movie Ghostbusters? Do you remember when Bill Murry tried with all of his energies not to think of anything frightening, because he was told that he would cause whatever he was afraid of to actually happen? Instead of stopping his fear, his efforts to resist it caused him to think of the worst thing he could imagine: a giant version of the Stay Puff Marshmallow Man ransacking New York City. (I still have nightmares of the SPMM, by the way.) Okay, dumb example, but the point is that resisting an idea with all of my energies usually has the negative effect of empowering it. Try saying, "I will not worry, I will not worry," or, "I will not lust, I will not lust," or "I will not want more food, I will not want more food..." I think you get the point. It just doesn't work.

The 'welcoming prayer' offers a third alternative. Instead of ignoring the afflictive thought, or exerting all of my energies against it, the welcoming prayer welcomes it and presents it to God to transform it. It acknowledges it as harmful, but peacefully delivers it to God to heal it.

There are three simple steps to the welcoming prayer. To illustrate them, let's go back to my recent experience.

The first step is to acknowledge the afflictive thoughts for what they are. So, I simply recognize the prejudice and judgment. I acknowledge them. I pay attention to what they do to me. Perhaps this sudden onset of prejudice makes my stomach hurt, or my palms sweat, or my head pound. In this first step it's as though I'm playfully saying, "Ah, prejudice and judgment, I see that you're back and I see what you're doing to me."

The second step is to welcome the afflictive thought or thoughts. (I know this seems terribly strange, but hang in there with me. Don't string me up from the heretic's pole just yet!) As a way of disarming the power of these anxious thoughts, I welcome them. "Prejudice, judgmentalism, I recognize you and I welcome you." Notice what's happening here. Instead of fighting them, and in so doing giving them more power, I am disarming their power by welcoming them. The goal here is to become less anxious about these afflictive thoughts, so that I can release them.

One note of warning. Don't try to do this second step too quickly! You may wish to take a few deep breaths and say it over and again, "______________ (whatever the afflictive thought is that has grasped you) I welcome you." Do it again and again. Be playful. Stop fighting. Slowly let go of your anxiety about the harmful idea that has grasped you.

The third and final step of the welcoming prayer is to prayerfully release it to God, and invite God to transform it. "Loving God, I release to you this prejudice and judgment , and ask you to transform it into something good in Jesus' name." Here, I am simply trusting God, my healer, to transform these afflictive ideas for God's good purposes.

I have on several occasions experienced how God can tame and transform destructive thoughts through the welcoming prayer. I recommend this to you, and look forward to hearing your responses. Please blog your questions, responses or concerns. And remember:

"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind (Romans 12:2)."